In class we wrote our first "essay". We were able to choose our own topic, I am very interested in the medical field, so I chose the HIPPA law. The HIPPA law is a law that protects medical documents, and medical information. I wrote my rough draft and had a peer review my work in class. The following responses are ways I felt I could better my paper.
1) Do you need more specific examples?
- I felt I gave adequate examples in my paper that described my issue and was right to the point.
2) Do you need to revise with your reader in mind? (better explain things)
- My peer who reviewed my paper was unsure of my question, so I tried to make my question
more visible to the reader.
3) Do you need to reorganize your points?
- I actually did reorganize a couple of my paragraphs so my beginning paragraphs would flow
better.
4) Do you need to take the filler out?
- Honestly, I don't believe I used a filler, if I did it was not intentional.
5) Do your main ideas need to be clearer? When in doubt, tell the reader
your main idea as soon as possible, then, discuss how you get there.
- I just believe I needed to make my main question more clear.
6) Should you rephrase your research question to take the complexity of the situation into account?
- No, I believe I had a good, complex research topic, with many scenarios to expand on.
7) Do you need a new research issue?
- No, my research question is extremely relevant to the medical world, and society.
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